So, I pretty much hate doctors, no offense to any of my doctor friends. It's totally not your fault. I just have terrible luck when it comes to them. I can never be 100% normal, no questions asked. There has to be some question as to whether or not I'm normal. I'm always bordering normal and tragedy it seems.
Let's take this pregnancy, for instance. In the beginning, my blood test results came back, and they showed that my progesterone was low. Now, it wasn't tragically low, but it was low enough for my loving OB to put me on some wacky ass medication for it that completely jacked my system and made me feel drunk all the time. It was low enough to make my hubby and I worry that maybe this wasn't "it" and that we could lose the baby. So, after realizing that this medication was not going to be workable in our lives, we had resigned ourselves to the thought that this, indeed, may not be the time, and I called my doctor to let her know what was going on with the medication and that I just couldn't take it any longer. She had me come in to be retested, and BOOM. Magically, at that point, my levels were totally normal. Great!
Fast forward a couple days, and I'm having an asthma attack while on VACATION in Chicago...My rescue inhaler was doing nothing for me, and I had to ride that one out until I got back home. Then, I had to start taking a ridiculously expensive medication for asthma (which, thankfully, worked!) after having zero symptoms since high school. At the same time, I'm puking my pregnant guts out more times than I can count in a day...So I started Zofran for that...until I was NINETEEN weeks pregnant. Now, please allow me to point out that I don't view my asthmatic episodes or my morning sickness (I use the term lightly) as tragic at all. That's just icing on my almost tragic cake.
Now let's talk about yesterday. Yesterday I went for what was supposed to be a normal bi-weekly OB appointment, which turned out to be insane. I woke up late and had to rush out the door with enough time to brush my teeth, pee, throw on an outfit that didn't match, put on a hat, and grab an apple streudel. Forget the coffee, this was serious. So I roll into the parking lot and have to park a friggin mile away and magically make it to the office at exactly 8:45. Now for the "oopsies." Well, I weighed in (don't even ask) and realized I didn't have to pee since I already had 20 minutes ago at home! So fine, sometimes this happens. I just told the nurse I'd go at some point before leaving, which generally is no big deal. WELL, not today, folks! My bp was 144/70, so my OB wanted a sample to check for protein before seeing me. UGH. Fine. So I squeezed out what I could, set the cup on the edge of the sink, and knocked it in. Are you effing kidding me right now?! I could've cried. I called my hubby to calm me down, and he assured me that everything would be okay...well, sure it would, AFTER I drank a liter and a half of water and was able to produce said sample, which I did (who knows how many minutes later). And everything was perfectly fine. Apparently, rushing around in the morning and walking a mile isn't something an 8 months pregnant chick should do. Now, onto the measuring! I measured 35, and I am supposedly (according to my doctor) 31 weeks pregnant. According to me, I'm 32+, but apparently I don't count. Either way, that's still a big measurement, so she ordered an ultrasound to see what's going on in there. I went back yesterday afternoon for this ultrasound and got a call early in the evening from my doctor. Apparently I have an almost too high level of amniotic fluid, combined with a baby with a huge head. Going back to the amniotic fluid, my level is 24, and over 25 is too high. Who knew?! I had no idea that there was such a thing as too much amniotic fluid. I also had no idea that this could cause problems for me or baby! So now I get to play the waiting game for another couple of weeks before checking on the fluid level again...See? Almost tragic. It's not the end of the world, but it could be a big problem. If my fluid level goes above 25, she'll need to refer me to maternal fetal medicine, which would totally suck. I want my OB, not some stranger I don't know.
So I have my next ultrasound scheduled for November 11th...Let's hope all is well and that this was just another bump on my almost tragic road.
Til Next time...
Friday, October 29, 2010
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Tryin' It On...
So we chose the names, one for if this baby is a girl and one if the baby is a boy. We were completely prepared...and THEN, I woke up one day and realized they weren't perfect. I equate this to trying on wedding gowns. It's the only thing that can even come close to naming your child. When you're trying on dresses, you just know. And this is 100% true. When you try on the gown that you want to look at yourself in photos in for the rest of your life, you just know it's right. It sounds lame, but whatever. So when you are choosing a name for your legacy, that is your child, it has to work the same way, right? I mean, sure, I come across names and think, "oh, that's cute..." But then there is just that one name that you just can't get out of your head, the one that you and your hubby look at each other and smile and say, "yep, that's the one!" So then what happens if you have that feeling that a name is "the one," and your hubby doesn't feel the same way? What do you do then? Do you go back to the list of "cutes" and just choose one on which you can both agree?
Well, for me, I had one name in mind for a girl that I just couldn't let go of, no matter how hard I tried. I honestly liked the name we had chosen, and so I was okay with it, but I just kept going back to the wedding dress theory. I'm going to call my child this name for the rest of forever. So I told my very patient and loving hubby that I wanted to think about different names...and he told me to let him know when I'd made a decision...He laughed about it, saying that he doesn't understand why I can't just stick with one and be done. And this comment totally got me thinking.
You see, it's totally different for guys. Girls are mean and judgmental, and if a girl has the wrong name, she's a stripper, or a librarian, or a nerd or what.ever. If a guy has the wrong name, well, nobody seems to care! And I mean, is there such a thing as the wrong name for a guy? I'm not even sure there is. So whatever the case, I told my dear husband that as long as I could choose the name if we have a girl, he can choose the name for a boy. And I honestly don't care if he chooses Captain, Buddy, Jeep, or whatever. It doesn't matter to me. And I am pretty excited now because this forces some major involvement on his part! So now, he gets to do some thinking and decision-making! Yipee! Victory for Mama!
Til Next time...
Well, for me, I had one name in mind for a girl that I just couldn't let go of, no matter how hard I tried. I honestly liked the name we had chosen, and so I was okay with it, but I just kept going back to the wedding dress theory. I'm going to call my child this name for the rest of forever. So I told my very patient and loving hubby that I wanted to think about different names...and he told me to let him know when I'd made a decision...He laughed about it, saying that he doesn't understand why I can't just stick with one and be done. And this comment totally got me thinking.
You see, it's totally different for guys. Girls are mean and judgmental, and if a girl has the wrong name, she's a stripper, or a librarian, or a nerd or what.ever. If a guy has the wrong name, well, nobody seems to care! And I mean, is there such a thing as the wrong name for a guy? I'm not even sure there is. So whatever the case, I told my dear husband that as long as I could choose the name if we have a girl, he can choose the name for a boy. And I honestly don't care if he chooses Captain, Buddy, Jeep, or whatever. It doesn't matter to me. And I am pretty excited now because this forces some major involvement on his part! So now, he gets to do some thinking and decision-making! Yipee! Victory for Mama!
Til Next time...
Friday, October 15, 2010
~*Mommy Magic*~
So it's already started off to be a great day. It's funny how life happens in waves like that, isn't it? Some days you are just aching for something exciting or interesting to happen, and then there are those moments of negativity that seem never-ending. Well, this morning, when I was jolted awake at 4:30 by my daughter's coughing fits, it became a positive moment that I never wanted to end.
You see, these moments with her are so very rare, that I really didn't care that it was 4:30 a.m. and that I was surely not getting back to sleep. I quietly told my husband (who was sleeping on the sofa himself so as not to disturb my sleep with HIS coughing fits) that I was going to go lay with her and asked him to get her some water. He obliged, of course, being the amazing man that he is, while I went and snuggled up next to my little one.
She was shivering when I walked in, despite being completely snuggled up in her blankets and plenty warm to the touch. As soon as I laid down with her, she immediately stopped shaking and deeply sighed. I could've cried right then (if I was a crier), but instead I just kissed the back of her head and put my arms around her. My husband came in shortly after with a drink for her, which she sipped on for a bit and then gave back to me. I set it down, and we snuggled back up in bed...She didn't cough from then on. She breathed deeply, though a little congested, and was completely content with my being next to her.
These are the moments we live for as parents. Well, at least that's what I believe. It's those small moments in time that we wish we could hold onto forever, you know? It's moments like these that I see the magic in life, the Mommy Magic- how somehow when Mommy kisses that boo-boo, it's all better, no matter how much it was hurting just moments before she kissed it. I think, as adults, we get so wrapped up in logic and how things work that sometimes we need these moments to make us realize that magic does exist.
So thank you to my beautiful daughter for giving me that gift this morning, even if it was before the rooster crows. Thanks for showing me what's really important in life and that I am just as magical as I've always thought my mommy was...
Til next time...
You see, these moments with her are so very rare, that I really didn't care that it was 4:30 a.m. and that I was surely not getting back to sleep. I quietly told my husband (who was sleeping on the sofa himself so as not to disturb my sleep with HIS coughing fits) that I was going to go lay with her and asked him to get her some water. He obliged, of course, being the amazing man that he is, while I went and snuggled up next to my little one.
She was shivering when I walked in, despite being completely snuggled up in her blankets and plenty warm to the touch. As soon as I laid down with her, she immediately stopped shaking and deeply sighed. I could've cried right then (if I was a crier), but instead I just kissed the back of her head and put my arms around her. My husband came in shortly after with a drink for her, which she sipped on for a bit and then gave back to me. I set it down, and we snuggled back up in bed...She didn't cough from then on. She breathed deeply, though a little congested, and was completely content with my being next to her.
These are the moments we live for as parents. Well, at least that's what I believe. It's those small moments in time that we wish we could hold onto forever, you know? It's moments like these that I see the magic in life, the Mommy Magic- how somehow when Mommy kisses that boo-boo, it's all better, no matter how much it was hurting just moments before she kissed it. I think, as adults, we get so wrapped up in logic and how things work that sometimes we need these moments to make us realize that magic does exist.
So thank you to my beautiful daughter for giving me that gift this morning, even if it was before the rooster crows. Thanks for showing me what's really important in life and that I am just as magical as I've always thought my mommy was...
Til next time...
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
How Much for Women's Intuition?
Some might say it's a myth, but I am a firm believer in this super power. I was speaking to a friend of mine today and explaining to her about a situation I've been upset about regarding a certain woman in my life. Said woman shall remain nameless, however, but suffice it to say that she SHOULD be a big part of our family's lives. At any rate, she has been quite detached. I have told my husband from DAY 1 that she just doesn't like me. Does she have good reasoning? Who knows...She might think I'm the one who turned him away from the Church. She might be unhappy that we were pregnant before we were married (Lord, strike me down immediately!). It may have something to do with the fact that we didn't baptize our kid "just in case" we're wrong in our belief system. She might be pissed that I'm a better cook than she is. Hell, she could even have no reason at all. I. Don't. Know. Nor is it relevant. The point is that I've had that tingly feeling down to my bare bones from the moment that I met her that she had it in for me.
My husband says that I'm wrong and that this woman has told him on multiple occasions that she has no beef with me and that she, in fact, "likes" me. Well, let me think for a moment. She's pretty close to my husband, so why on Earth would she say to him, "you know, since you asked, I think she's a horrible bitch. I hope she wraps her imported vehicle around a telephone pole the next time she leaves the house"? She'd rather play the innocent card, making me out to be the paranoid housewife. It's much easier to place the blame on someone else, rather than take responsibility for your own feelings, isn't it? I mean, I just look like a crazy person, making ridiculous accusations, meanwhile she's got that twisted smile on her face, holding the fresh-baked poisoned cookies she's hoping to shove down my throat.
And all the while, she plays my husband like a damn fiddle, getting everything she wants. It's pretty disgusting, actually. She is SO good at the whole manipulation game that he doesn't even REALIZE he's taking her side and defending her to me. If I didn't absolutely loathe her with every fiber of my being, I'd want to BE her. The best part is that by manipulating my husband, she manipulates ME in the process. See, because I obviously don't want him to be sad or unhappy, so I give in to what he wants, which is actually what SHE wants. UGH.
So I guess all I'm saying in all of this is that I have known for YEARS that this woman doesn't like me. I also know that if she wants to be involved with our family, she has no choice but to put up with me. And I don't need any pudding to prove me right. I've got woman's intuition...which, by the way, is NOT for sale. Any woman out there willing to put a price on yours? Yeah, didn't think so...
Til next time...
My husband says that I'm wrong and that this woman has told him on multiple occasions that she has no beef with me and that she, in fact, "likes" me. Well, let me think for a moment. She's pretty close to my husband, so why on Earth would she say to him, "you know, since you asked, I think she's a horrible bitch. I hope she wraps her imported vehicle around a telephone pole the next time she leaves the house"? She'd rather play the innocent card, making me out to be the paranoid housewife. It's much easier to place the blame on someone else, rather than take responsibility for your own feelings, isn't it? I mean, I just look like a crazy person, making ridiculous accusations, meanwhile she's got that twisted smile on her face, holding the fresh-baked poisoned cookies she's hoping to shove down my throat.
And all the while, she plays my husband like a damn fiddle, getting everything she wants. It's pretty disgusting, actually. She is SO good at the whole manipulation game that he doesn't even REALIZE he's taking her side and defending her to me. If I didn't absolutely loathe her with every fiber of my being, I'd want to BE her. The best part is that by manipulating my husband, she manipulates ME in the process. See, because I obviously don't want him to be sad or unhappy, so I give in to what he wants, which is actually what SHE wants. UGH.
So I guess all I'm saying in all of this is that I have known for YEARS that this woman doesn't like me. I also know that if she wants to be involved with our family, she has no choice but to put up with me. And I don't need any pudding to prove me right. I've got woman's intuition...which, by the way, is NOT for sale. Any woman out there willing to put a price on yours? Yeah, didn't think so...
Til next time...
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
I've Got Lysol in My Holster...It's All Good
So as I sit here sipping my afternoon tea, I am yet again entertained by the moms of Indy. I love it when people have nothing better to do than complain. It's fantastic for my writing! So let me give you a quick run-down:
Mom A complains that her child keeps coming home with minor afflictions ever since being enrolled in preschool. Prior to this term, he has been at home with her and did not attend any type of childcare. She states that she believes parents should be respectful by keeping their sick children at home. (I will tell you MY opinion on this later) Differing opinions ensue, as you can imagine. THEN, Mom A comments that she has come up with a solution and has given her child a can of Lysol to bring with him to school and has instructed him to spray anyone who gets too close.
Here comes the party, folks! Moms get royally OUTRAGED at the fact that this mom could say such a thing. They lecture on about how dangerous Lysol is, from inhalation to skin reactions and actually went so far as to ask if Mom A has read the warning label on the can. One mom warned that if he used this "Lysol tactic" that he could be permanently expelled for assault. Yet another mom mentioned Poison Control...
And now for what you've all been waiting for...MY OPINION!!!
First of all, are you EFFING kidding me right now?! If we kept our kids (and ourselves for that matter) home for every sniffle, runny nose and cough, we would be friggin BEARS and hibernate all winter. This is an absolutely ludicrous idea. How the hell am I supposed to get groceries? What.ever. Give me a break. So if I'm evil for sending my kid to preschool with the sniffles, call me the Devil. I don't have kids that age, but believe me, when I do, I'm sending them to school. What are we teaching our children if we don't? We're teaching them that if they're stuffy or runny-nosed or just not feeling 100%, they can stay home. Fast forward several years, and you've got yourself a loser adult/child living at home with YOU with no job. Not only that, but we're often contagious before showing symptoms of something, so now what? My advice is to beef up your kids' immune systems during the fall/winter months, rather than expecting everyone to be the "responsible, respectful" parents. Do what YOU can because the rest is out of your control. And I have found that it's just not worth getting upset about things that are outside that realm.
Secondly, I canNOT believe how seriously some of these women take themselves! I mean, really, you think Mom A REALLY gave her kid a can of Lysol and said "go to town, Baby!" Doubtful. It's called sarcasm, humor, making light of an intense discussion. I honestly laughed out loud at the thought of a kid pulling a can of Lysol out of his holster and saying, "back off, buddy! I see that germ-infested snot hanging from your nostril, and I don't want none of that!" Loosen your ponytails, ladies. It's called a damn JOKE.
Til next time...
Mom A complains that her child keeps coming home with minor afflictions ever since being enrolled in preschool. Prior to this term, he has been at home with her and did not attend any type of childcare. She states that she believes parents should be respectful by keeping their sick children at home. (I will tell you MY opinion on this later) Differing opinions ensue, as you can imagine. THEN, Mom A comments that she has come up with a solution and has given her child a can of Lysol to bring with him to school and has instructed him to spray anyone who gets too close.
Here comes the party, folks! Moms get royally OUTRAGED at the fact that this mom could say such a thing. They lecture on about how dangerous Lysol is, from inhalation to skin reactions and actually went so far as to ask if Mom A has read the warning label on the can. One mom warned that if he used this "Lysol tactic" that he could be permanently expelled for assault. Yet another mom mentioned Poison Control...
And now for what you've all been waiting for...MY OPINION!!!
First of all, are you EFFING kidding me right now?! If we kept our kids (and ourselves for that matter) home for every sniffle, runny nose and cough, we would be friggin BEARS and hibernate all winter. This is an absolutely ludicrous idea. How the hell am I supposed to get groceries? What.ever. Give me a break. So if I'm evil for sending my kid to preschool with the sniffles, call me the Devil. I don't have kids that age, but believe me, when I do, I'm sending them to school. What are we teaching our children if we don't? We're teaching them that if they're stuffy or runny-nosed or just not feeling 100%, they can stay home. Fast forward several years, and you've got yourself a loser adult/child living at home with YOU with no job. Not only that, but we're often contagious before showing symptoms of something, so now what? My advice is to beef up your kids' immune systems during the fall/winter months, rather than expecting everyone to be the "responsible, respectful" parents. Do what YOU can because the rest is out of your control. And I have found that it's just not worth getting upset about things that are outside that realm.
Secondly, I canNOT believe how seriously some of these women take themselves! I mean, really, you think Mom A REALLY gave her kid a can of Lysol and said "go to town, Baby!" Doubtful. It's called sarcasm, humor, making light of an intense discussion. I honestly laughed out loud at the thought of a kid pulling a can of Lysol out of his holster and saying, "back off, buddy! I see that germ-infested snot hanging from your nostril, and I don't want none of that!" Loosen your ponytails, ladies. It's called a damn JOKE.
Til next time...
More Than 24
So, I've been MIA for the past several days, or so it seems. Generally, I just need more than 24 hours in the day. I would draft an email to God asking for just a couple more hours, but that would be pointless. Although, I read on a church sign in Fishers that "God answers knee mails." Maybe I should try that...I have a feeling that less sleep and more coffee will be a hell of a lot more productive, though. I guess I just need to learn to optimize the 24 that I have been given.
So for those who are wondering, I had a ladies' night at my home on Friday. I was surprised by several things with regard to this venture. For one, I have a LOT of friends! When the hell did that happen, and how did I not notice this? And for the amount of friends that I have, why aren't they ALL following my blog? Hmmm, guilt trips will ensue following this entry. Anyway, there were 10 of us, half a case of Mallow Run Wine (THANK YOU, KAT!), and about 50 lbs of sugar divided amongst treats which included M&Ms, caramel apple Hershey kisses, Cupcakes (THANKS, ELESE!), apple crisp, turtle pumpkin cheese ball, chocolate-dipped Oreos, chocolate-covered popcorn, & of course the gourmet caramel apples that we all made. I mean does it get any better? Wine, women & chocolate...I'm pretty sure that we all had a GREAT time; at least I know I did. Due to the success of this ladies' night, I definitely plan to do another one, though I'm not exactly sure when, considering I'm having a baby in like 8 or 9 weeks...
I've lived here for nearly 4 years now, and I've never felt more at home anywhere. It is such an amazing feeling, especially when I think back to the first weekend trip I made here for my birthday in 2006. Upon reflection, I see how far I have come from the broken-hearted-yet-determined-to-find-happiness person of yesteryear to the Goddess I am today. I'm proud of myself. I went from having next to nothing to having everything and more that I could ever ask for in life. It has been an amazing journey, and I honestly can't wait to see what life has in store for me in the future.
Wow, this isn't all over the place at ALL! Anyway, 'til next time...
So for those who are wondering, I had a ladies' night at my home on Friday. I was surprised by several things with regard to this venture. For one, I have a LOT of friends! When the hell did that happen, and how did I not notice this? And for the amount of friends that I have, why aren't they ALL following my blog? Hmmm, guilt trips will ensue following this entry. Anyway, there were 10 of us, half a case of Mallow Run Wine (THANK YOU, KAT!), and about 50 lbs of sugar divided amongst treats which included M&Ms, caramel apple Hershey kisses, Cupcakes (THANKS, ELESE!), apple crisp, turtle pumpkin cheese ball, chocolate-dipped Oreos, chocolate-covered popcorn, & of course the gourmet caramel apples that we all made. I mean does it get any better? Wine, women & chocolate...I'm pretty sure that we all had a GREAT time; at least I know I did. Due to the success of this ladies' night, I definitely plan to do another one, though I'm not exactly sure when, considering I'm having a baby in like 8 or 9 weeks...
I've lived here for nearly 4 years now, and I've never felt more at home anywhere. It is such an amazing feeling, especially when I think back to the first weekend trip I made here for my birthday in 2006. Upon reflection, I see how far I have come from the broken-hearted-yet-determined-to-find-happiness person of yesteryear to the Goddess I am today. I'm proud of myself. I went from having next to nothing to having everything and more that I could ever ask for in life. It has been an amazing journey, and I honestly can't wait to see what life has in store for me in the future.
Wow, this isn't all over the place at ALL! Anyway, 'til next time...
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
So Mad I Could [CLEAN]
So, as you may or may not know, my husband is the sole breadwinner in our home. This is sometimes really AWESOME and other times, it drives me insane. Why? Well, I've spent most of my adult life working to support myself and or my partner. When that gets taken away, it creates a monster. That monster is the Domestic Goddess--you know, the mom/wife who cooks, cleans, budgets, shops, and generally keeps the family organized. On most days, this is a great balance. On other days, I like to call those days "end of pay period" days, it can become problematic. It's problematic when my husband, who basically works on commission, doesn't have a great week at work. This means that we're on a tighter than usual budget, and there's literally NOTHING I can do about it. It used to be that if we were short, I'd go in and work an extra shift at the bar or snag a babysitting job to make up the difference. Now, I just get to sit and stew about it and try to figure out how to get even more creative with the finances...
Well, I suppose you can imagine by now that today was an "end of pay period" day...a crappy one. Well, thankfully, it didn't end too crappy. Although I'm pretty sure that had to do with some creativity on my part and some gentle "coaching" of my loving husband. Okay, so maybe the coaching wasn't so gentle...but hey, a Goddess has to do what a Goddess has to do, and sometimes the measures are extreme. I hate to say it, but it works.
Funny thing is, when I get mad, I clean. I don't know about anyone else, but when I am mad, I am more productive than EVER! Maybe this was a strategy on my husband's part now that I think of it...Hmmmm, well if it was, it worked. I cleaned like a mad woman! I'm talking washing cabinets, walls, dusting, vacuuming (including furniture), picking up a plethora of toys, even windows! Then, later in the afternoon, when I was already completely over the whole argument and chatting up the neighbors about it, I thought aloud..."Now, I wonder who really benefited from this whole deal?" Seriously! I get mad, and my husband gets a clean house?!
So today I must say that I feel accomplished. My husband was able to get his act together and pull off a good paycheck, AND my house is clean. I'd say that this "end of pay period" day was a pretty damn good one!
Well, I suppose you can imagine by now that today was an "end of pay period" day...a crappy one. Well, thankfully, it didn't end too crappy. Although I'm pretty sure that had to do with some creativity on my part and some gentle "coaching" of my loving husband. Okay, so maybe the coaching wasn't so gentle...but hey, a Goddess has to do what a Goddess has to do, and sometimes the measures are extreme. I hate to say it, but it works.
Funny thing is, when I get mad, I clean. I don't know about anyone else, but when I am mad, I am more productive than EVER! Maybe this was a strategy on my husband's part now that I think of it...Hmmmm, well if it was, it worked. I cleaned like a mad woman! I'm talking washing cabinets, walls, dusting, vacuuming (including furniture), picking up a plethora of toys, even windows! Then, later in the afternoon, when I was already completely over the whole argument and chatting up the neighbors about it, I thought aloud..."Now, I wonder who really benefited from this whole deal?" Seriously! I get mad, and my husband gets a clean house?!
So today I must say that I feel accomplished. My husband was able to get his act together and pull off a good paycheck, AND my house is clean. I'd say that this "end of pay period" day was a pretty damn good one!
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